Thread:Silver-Haired Seireitou/@comment-5651818-20151022021922/@comment-2089817-20151022023627

Well, when I first started reading it, I felt like there's too much of an emphasis on his connection with women and how they perceive him. From one paragraph detailing how he hopelessly blushes, to another about him being eternally "friendzoned", this isn't a BAD thing but you should be careful not to focus too heavily upon this. I see very little in regards to his aspirations besides his medical clinic, and I feel like that should be further explored. In addition, you should go further into the hero complex idea. I get that he feels the need to help people in need, but nobody is 100% altruistic. I doubt Mikado is meant to be a total saint, so you want to branch off from this and go into what he is looking to gain out of it, or if he's doing this as a sort of revenge for crimes done to him in the past, or something like that.