Talk:Shiki

Review
Personality: Shiki appears to demonstrate characteristics of a Sociopath. In that case you can probably learn a lot by reading up on some material at either wiki or another online sight to better incorporate such traits into the character. Given his appearance, and nobility, Shiki would probably be better portrayed as a young charming noble, but with a hidden pyschotic nature. In order to make him more unique than the standard Sociopath, and to compliment his negative emotion feeding, he could be known for his excessive cruelty in those that cross his path, a sort of glimpse into the dark nature of this character. As for teammates, it could be a matter of trust, OR it could simply be a matter of whether they can be used as pawns or not. Personally I favor the latter, as it means you can appear tolerable, but in secret you're already planning their death.

History

Birth of the Beast: You should elaborate on his exact origins. Because the way its stated his creation is no different than say...a Menos. Was he formally a Plus that instead absorbed Hollows through a unique power, or did he in life have the ability to absorb negative emotions, which was only amplified when he died that started absorbing hollows altogether (given that they are born from negative emotions, it could be an interesting ability to simply devour low-ranking hollows). As for his resurgance, he could have infiltrated soul society, or perhaps used his charms to win the hearts of the nobility, before secretly killing them and taking over their assets. Things like this can provide good examples of your characters evil nature, and the lengths he's willing to go, to achieve whatever it is he wants.

A Beast on the Run: Imho a more logical approach is the Gotei 13 investigating your dissappearance by following your trail, eventually discovering the rather mysterious circumstances of your ascension with the deaths of those who knew you. This would in turn lead them to trying to capture you since your status would have made known to the Nobles, who would REALLY want you dead.

Life of an Imprisoned Beast: Im not sure if you were detained as any normal criminal in the Maggots nest or sealed in Muken the bottom level, since according to canon is where Aizen was sealed. I can only guess that its reserved for soul society's greatest criminals who cannot be killed (as Aizen is immortal due to the Hougyoku). In such a case you would need to elaborate as to how he managed to avoid execution (since nobility would have killed...repeatedly) and then how you met with Aizen and the exact circumstances of their conversation and why Aizen would be interested in conversing with you. Given the gap between you two, and I mean you no insult, but I wouldnt be interested in having a conversation with an insect...a worm no less (no offense). It would have to be more realistic than that to make sense to the average reader, including your escape.

Demonic Beasts Ravage the Tamed: Once again, you should elaborate on how he integrated himself into Hell, especially considering he's a different race, probably one they dont care too much for. His relationship with Bael and the Cardinals should also described in detail, either as part of this history in or short Arcs briefly describing his actions and their consequences.

As for destroying Soul Society; this has been overdone so much, that its the default stand most enemies take against Soul Society. I would strongly suggest you do something unique, and elaborate how you plan to do it. It gives characters much more life if they can do something beyond "destroying soul society".

As for his powers and abilities, you may need to explain beyond his creation as to how he gained such skills and abilities. Given your current history, he prefers a rather luxurious life style, not spending his time training and honing his skills. Anyway thats all I have for now, hope it helps. --- Illuminate Void 18:22, October 24, 2010 (UTC)